Stephen Quint and the ZOMBIE MIKADO

DALLAVAPALOOZA!

Tuesday night was  a NYGASP function. Or "event," if functions frighten you. When you get to the age of some of the people who were there last night, any time anything functions it's an event. And perhaps frightening. "Louis Dall'Ava and Friends, or DALLAVAPALOOZA!" was presented for the amusement of ourselves and the NYGASP Guild. Louis was the winner of this year's Isaac Asimov Award. Yes, THAT Asimov, the great writer/humanitarian/profound imagination/
Gilbert and Sullivan geek and avowed NYGASP fan. This is NOT the Asimov Award that goes to a college undergrad sci-fi/fantasy short story writer or the Asimov Award that goes to devout skeptics of "paranormal activity." This particular Asimov Award goes "to recognize outstanding achievement among NYGASP's many talented artists." It's a name-on-a-plaque type award -- no cash. Al has long had a bug up his ass about Louis which this award hopefully proves has been fully worked out. The show last night was put together by Louis, with help from Michael Galante and pianist Andi Stryker-Rodda, and consisted of 27 NYGASP performers singing G&S that they've never actually performed for the company. So it gave a lot of the fantastic chorus people a chance to blaze in the luster of unaccustomed attention. Also a Pirate King could sing Strephon, a Josephine could sing Phyllis, etcetera and so forth. Everybody was excellent and it was a hell of a show, put together with 2 rehearsals and much appreciated by all and by Al, who got a free concert with all the annoying scheduling, rehearsing, and grunt work done by Louis.

The final number listed on the program, the "Finale Ultimo" (Michael Galante's term) was "Three Little Maids" performed by Michael, ALAN HILL, and Louis, with revised lyrics including
"Three little boys who like to party,
Stay late at bars, but don't talk 'arty,'
Eat anything but beans -- too farty."
Louis' favorite joke, known well to all in the company -- there's a recipe for Irish chili. It's like regular chili except you put in only 239 beans. One more than that and it's TOO FARTY!!!! (Yelled in broad Irish accent.)

The real final song, though, not on the "Programme" (also Michael's word) was "Sisters," the Irving Berlin duet from that awful (in my opinion anyway) Bing Crosby/Danny Kaye holiday atrocity White Christmas, sung by Louis and me, with affecting choreography. It went over about as you might expect (monster hit, screaming, stomping, transports of bliss) but it wasn't all it could have been, due to the butting in with closing remarks by Al and wife Gail and a bit of confusion from Louis and me on how to proceed after it. Our original intention was to get into a fight, which would have gone a little bit like this...

LOUIS: Well, that about does it for "Louis Dall'Ava and Friends." That's everything on the program(me). I want to thank you all for coming and to thank once again all my NYGASP friends who took part tonight, even Steve Quint, who's here but WASN'T INTERESTED in singing...
STEVE (from the audience): Louis, I never said I wasn't interested in taking part! You asked if there was any Gilbert and Sullivan I was particularly interested in singing and I said "Not particularly."
LOUIS: Oh, admit it. You didn't want to sing because you're jealous. I notice that when you got the award Al couldn't trust YOU to be in charge of a program!
STEVE: Well, he only asked you because you say 'yes' to everything! Al's new favorite, aren't you? "Louie, fix that wig. Louie, clean that costume. Louie, can you lift that? Louie, light my cigarette."
LOUIS: Al doesn't smoke!
STEVE: Jealous, what would I be jealous of? Ladies and gentlemen, this man is GAY! Look at him, an admitted homosexual! AND HE DRINKS STRONG SPIRITS!
LOUIS: Oh, and you don't drink? You are jealous! A jealous and bitter little patter man!
STEVE: Don't call me 'little man!' I'll stick you with a fork!
LOUIS: BITTER PATTER, BITTER PATTER, BITTER PATTER
And that was to have been Andi's cue. We would have kept yelling at each other until Andi hit a 'G' and we started our song:
"Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters.
Never had to have a chaperon, no sir,
I'm here to keep my eye on her" etc.

Yeah, well, none of that was actually scripted; we improvised it the day we got the idea. We probably wouldn't have said the stuff about the drinking and the gayness, OR WOULD WE????????????????

Dis heah be Louis Dall'Ava.   

"Over the Hedge"

I just saw Over the Hedge with the kids and it was pretty good. William Shatner has a big role as an opossum. HE IS ASTONISHING. THIS MAN MUST NEVER DIE. Please, casting directors and producers! I realize you are extraordinarily stupid people but please see the wisdom of hiring this great, great actor at every opportunity! I -- I can't -- say -- any more.

A taste of freedom

Holy cats, folks! Here I am!

Well, you'll be pleased to know, or interested, or maybe lift an eyebrow or go on a killing spree to learn that my cast was removed a week ago. Ironic, ain't it, an actor rejoicing at being taken out of the cast. My wretched old body has repaired itself enough so that my godly doctors have deigned that I should be granted the dignity of having my forearm free and wearing a 2-piece plastic cuff/brace thing between shoulder and elbow. This will go on for about another month. But I can type with two hands now! I can wiggle my wrist all over the place. Absolutely mandatory for a Gilbert and Sullivan performer. I tell you, it's too much -- I have to go outside and mince! Tee-hee!!!

Cast of Thousands of Annoyances

It's now the 7th week of the feast of the mangled humerus and the fun is actually decreasing, if possible. They've been replacing the cast with a nice, new, tight, white, clean one every couple of weeks, which feels great at first, but then your arm continues to shrivel and eventually to flop around inside the cast and everything turns awful. I'm going in on Thursday for fresh X-rays and of course I have high hopes as far as getting the cast off, or at least getting a smaller one put on, but I'm keeping my expectations low, low, low. Also this is the worst hay fever I've had in decades, which is why I happen to be up and writing at this silly hour. I think the pollen is most active at this time of day. But at least I'm not complaining about my bowels, God bless them, and anoint them in blessed bowel balm.

We've had some out-of-town Mikados, and Maggie gets better at every show. She vomited on Sunday on the bus back from New Haven because the driver wouldn't pull over on 9th Ave, and let us jump out. I'm sure he had his very fine reasons. Next NYGASP is Pirates, June 2 & 3 at the Wolf Trap Festival in Vienna, Virginia. I'm almost sure my cast will be off and that there will be much rejoicing, with fireworks in the evening. Wolf Trap is very fun. Immense, outdoor audience with access to booze.

I haven't sneezed in almost half a minute, so will try to sneak upstairs before my head explodes again.

Week 6 (out of projected 8)

The cast is still on and I don't mind telling you it gets on a person's nerves. Plus last night was even more sleep-deprived than usual and this morning my back, shoulder, and elbow are in more pain than I've had in weeks. Of course my career as a professional body builder has been destroyed and I'm getting by on cheese scraped from the inside of discarded pizza boxes. X-rays will be taken next Thursday if I can make it til then. You wouldn't believe how irritating typing is.