VAL says I should post more. I says you're getting what you pay for. I turned on the computer yesterday morning full of blog creativity -- and how much of that do you ever encounter? -- but was put off by a letter from a woman who objected to this site's body function to G&S ratio. "How can you call this a G&S site?" Well, how can I call this a ZOMBIE site? Zombies have been shockingly under-represented here and I'm going to do something about that right now! In a minute.
First I have to assure my literally almost DOZENS of faithful readers that this site will continue to be what it is. Only even more. I'm sorry. "Live with it! Or I should say DIE WITH IT! HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!!!"
That's from an Ed Wood movie and I would like to remember which.
I'm sorry.
Forget about slashers and say what you will about vampires and giant bugs. SCARY is a reanimated corpse who wants to eat you! Fortunately they move pretty slow. And when you kill the brain you kill the ghoul. Beat 'em or burn 'em, they go up pretty easy. I'll probably never forget -- uh -- what? I don't remember. Huh? Oh, yeah, the first time I saw George Romero's great Night of the Living Dead, about 25 years ago, at a Halloween triple feature at one of those many Manhattan revival houses which no longer exist. Cheap, black and white, mostly poor acting, music off scratchy records, and totally believable and terrifying. Plus there were only 3 other guys in the audience, that's always scary. Roger Ebert describes seeing this movie in a theater when it opened in 1968. A little girl was sitting across the aisle from him, watching and crying. She'd obviously been dumped there by her parents, who thought she'd have an afternoon of creepy fun. Ha! There are some people (Jane Hamilton) who think this movie is hilarious. Not me! I take it seriously -- seriously seriously -- and it gives me nightmares every time I watch it. Guaranteed nightmares every time! What better recommendation could you want? Romero's Dawn of the Dead is also a classic and Day of the Dead has its moments. The comedies Shaun of the Dead, Return of the Living Dead, and Dead Alive are very funny yet treat their zombies with the respect the dead deserve.
How about more on zombies some time when I'm into it, which the above testifies that I am not. That God damn woman's letter yesterday did take some of the feistiness out of me.
Gilbert and Sullivan: Utopia, Limited really, really sucks, and The Grand Duke is even worse.
Excrement: There are 7,000 species of dung beetles, all working to make the world a better, less smelly place.
Criswell says it in Orgy of the Dead, not really a Wood movie but script by him.
Posted by: Mr. Steve | February 16, 2006 at 11:46 AM
I've been picking my nose AND MY CAT'S NOSE while reading your most recent posting! I'm not sure if it's the unbelieveable pick I was able to 'mine' from Smokey's nose, or your posting that has made me so happy and excited. I guess it really doesn't matter, does it? Smokey can breathe freely and I'm going to set a match to the dried up cat-snot and see if it will smell any different from, say, burning hair. What do you think?
Posted by: eva | February 17, 2006 at 02:41 PM
I think you'd better relax, and stop playing with matches.
Posted by: Mr. Steve | February 17, 2006 at 11:02 PM
LISTEN, "EVA,"
Am I not in ENOUGH trouble with the G&S freaks who can't stand digestive talk? For God's sake DON'T get me started on boogers, animal boogers especially. This is too much. I CAN BAN YOU FROM COMMMENTING, YOU KNOW. Watch your smelly ass. Wash it, too.
Posted by: mr. steve | February 17, 2006 at 11:14 PM
Mr. Steve, you are a man of influence and importance. A highly esteemed professional in the world of G&S. I say this with the upmost respect and dignity I can muster: "Fuck those freaks who can't take a joke!" Gilbert himself would've chuckled and perhaps even have guffawed at ALL of your postings. Gilbert had a fun, silly spirit. I sure that if he were alive, he would he have liked to read about me setting a match to my cat's snot. Don't you agree?
(By the way, it didn't smell like burning hair at all, more like sweet, creamy garbage...)
Posted by: eva | February 18, 2006 at 12:55 PM
Once again we've established that Eva is revolting and Steve talks about his bowels too much. Please JESUS let us move on!
Posted by: Doug | February 18, 2006 at 02:12 PM
Who talks about his bowels too much? You're full of shit!
Posted by: Mr. Steve | February 19, 2006 at 10:59 AM
Now you're talking about MY bowels!!!
Posted by: Doug | February 19, 2006 at 11:25 AM
let's have more about fertilizer
Posted by: Mr. Howard | February 19, 2006 at 08:06 PM
Yes, Yes, Let's...more about fertilizer! Who are you Mr. Howard??? You're brilliant!
Posted by: eva | February 20, 2006 at 02:26 PM
I was just picking my nose and then farted while reading a book about fertilizer.
Posted by: BW | February 28, 2006 at 09:50 PM