If you're taking the trouble to read this you deserve a decent bio. I will refrain from devolving into utter fantasy and present you here with the basic FACTS, based on sworn testimony from the miserable souls who survived the terrifying ordeal.
I was born in Boston some time in the second half of the 20th Century. Ah, the 20th Century! I remember it well. Everything tasted better but was full of poison, TV shows were worse but less bad, and we had yet to wage a war of aggression. My parents were -- still are, actually -- two people from central Maine. Mom was becoming a music educator at BU and Dad, a WWII vet and University of Maine graduate, was doing jobs that Men Just Know How To Do. Mom abandoned college and we moved to their home town, Pittsfield, Maine, a year later when Tom was born.
Then Susan was born, then Dave, then Nancy, then Janet, and FINALLY, when I was a senior in high school, Doug. That's seven, in case you weren't counting. My parents liked kids, though it was "kind of" overwhelming for my mother. Also, my mother was a Catholic at the time, due to the influence of my fanatical but otherwise excellent, devoted grandparents.
I loved Catholicism until I was about 11. The costumes, the bells and smells, as Gilbert says, even the monotonous rants of the appalling priest -- there was something oppressively comforting about it which I assumed was the Presence of the Holy Spirit (that's the one who's the pigeon). But the clouds parted and I suddenly had a vision that the whole thing was laughable. I still LOL. Hurrah for Pope Herr "Benedict" Ratzinger, who will surely be responsible for the terminal gasp of the lardass Vatican II.
My dad was never religious, and shows no sign that he might find Christ now that he's old. He's still waiting for the flying saucer with Elvis to land in the back yard, though.
Dad started a propane gas business which got pretty successful. Tom and Dave took it over, and still live in our home town. Dave is the scion of an impressive large family. Tom had 3 kids and got divorced. He might be the funniest person in a pretty amusing family.
I started playing the French horn in 4th grade. Through high school I became progressively obsessed with it. The New England Conservatory of Music in Boston accepted me, and I stupidly went there all 4 years. A university would have been so much better for me. But at least it's done.
From Boston it was logical that New York would be next, for purposes of getting horn work. I played in Broadway pits, a wind quintet, and some local orchestras, and took out of town auditions.
While playing in the pits for some musicals and operettas and observing the performers of the character roles it occured to me that "Good Christ, that's horrible! I could do better than that." So I took some singing/acting auditions, and got the jobs! Never had a voice lesson. I sounded pretty good just from the wind I had acquired playing the French horn. Plus I had always been something of a ham.
So I was getting pretty good work on the horn and having some low-paying stage fun when ULCERATIVE COLITIS, the incredibly painful, disgusting, and inconvenient disease that had plagued me off and on since I was 16, made a return visit and just kept getting worse. Finally, in 1990, there was no choice but to go to a hospital and let them starve me and fill me with potent, but ultimately useless chemicals. After over a month of that torture it was decided to TAKE MY ENTIRE LARGE INTESTINE OUT and reroute some of the small intestine so I'd be all in one piece (no colostomy bag, though I did have one for a little while after the operation and found it very interesting and gross). The result is that now I have to go to the bathroom more often than most people and be very careful what I eat before a Wagner opera, but it's a lot better than debilitating cramps, painful, explosive bloody diarrhea, absence of appetite, and other horrors I'll leave you to imagine.
Because of the operation and the rearrangement of my innards it wasn't really possible to blow the horn. I got more stage work and started working with regional opera companies all over the US, doing mostly the Gilbert and Sullivan "patter" roles. Every opera company needs a Major-General every couple of years, and I developed a reputation as an inspired performer, the guy the audience always likes best, a trouper, a supporter of my directors and fellow actors. I got some directing gigs as well, which I'm happy to do on those occasions when the price is right. I get good reviews and fan mail and standing ovations. I work regularly with the esteemed New York Gilbert and Sullivan Players (NYGASP), the only professional G&S in the States.
THIS IS NOT TO SAY THAT I DON'T NEED MANAGEMENT, if you, gentle reader, are in the promotion biz. I used to take commercial and print auditions too, but stopped when it got just too damn annoying. Perhaps I'll go into more detail on that in one of my postings. HEADS WILL ROLL.
Recently I got married for the first time to widow Valerie Frankel (Google her) and got her cats and 2 kids: Maggie, from 1995, and Lucy, from '98. I'm in the process of living happily ever after. Watch this website for updates.
DO YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? Nosey.
Here's my resume. Can you actually bear it?
Brooklyn, NY 11201
Height: 5’5” / Weight: 145
Hair: Brown / Eyes: Blue
Attitude: Excellent /
Member, Actors’ Equity and
Local 802, American Federation of Musicians
A Time for Music --- Several Featured Roles --- Radio City Music Hall
Iolanthe --- Lord Chancellor --- Broadway Grand Opera
Trial by Jury --- The Judge --- New York Gilbert and Sullivan Players
H.M.S. Pinafore --- Sir Joseph Porter --- NYGASP
The Pirates of Penzance --- Major-General --- NYGASP
Princess Ida --- King Gama --- NYGASP
Utopia, Limited --- Scaphio --- NYGASP
The Mikado --- Ko-Ko --- NYGASP
The Yeomen of the Guard --- Jack Point --- NYGASP
French Ambassador --- Of Thee I Sing --- NYGASP
Waiting for Godot --- Vladimir --- New England Conservatory, Boston
Brigadoon --- Jeff --- Lakewood Summer Theater, NJ
Over The Moon --- W.S. Gilbert and his characters --- Skylight Opera Theater, WI
Fledermaus --- Frosch --- Opera Delaware, Wilmington
Fledermaus --- Dr. Blind --- Eugene Opera, OR
Lead tenor --- Albuquerque Opera Co.
The Pirates of Penzance --- Major-General --- Sorg Opera, OH; Boston Academy of Music; S. Carolina Opera, a bunch of other places
The Mikado --- Ko-Ko --- Eugene Opera; Mobile Opera; MI Opera, Others
Trial by Jury --- The Judge --- Anchorage Opera, AK
The Yeomen of the Guard --- Jack Point --- Bronx Opera, NY
H.M.S. Pinafore --- Sir Joseph --- Mobile Opera; Newberry Opera (S. Carolina)
Peter and the Wolf --- Narrator --- Charles Ives Festival Orchestra, CT
Patience --- Bunthorne --- Maine Opera Theatra (MOTHRA), Light Opera Company of Salisbury (LOCOS)
And so on. This is tiresome. I’ve played all the 13 Gilbert and Sullivan “patter” roles here and there, also Dick Deadeye, Pish-Tush, Lord Mountararat.
The Soldier’s Tale (Stravinsky) --- The Devil --- Sorg Opera
The Stranger’s Tale (Curtis Tucker) --- Homeless Man --- Sorg Opera
Turandot --- Emperor Altoum --- New York Grand Opera (in Central Park)
Otello --- Herald ---New York Grand Opera (also in the park)
Film and TV Commercial
Deconstructing Harry --- College Professor --- Woody Allen, Director
LSV Swiss Bank --- Plastic Surgeon --- Swiss National Commercial
Howard Stern's "Private Parts" --- a Person in a Crowd, I don't even remember.
Opera Northeast, Repertory Company; The Wandering Minstrels, Quintet; NYGASP, full productions of G&S -- literally HUNDREDS of performances nationally.
New England Conservatory of Music, BM in French horn, special recognition in composition. Acting and Improv with Scott Eck. Physical Comedy Workshop I and II with Jonah Emsig. Advanced Commercial Acting and Commercial Agent Showcase at Weist-Barron.
French horn. __ Qualified conductor. __ Tux and tails. __ “Works well with others,”—Miss Fern, 3rd grade. __ Have directed 19 professional productions. __ Driver’s license. __ Silly voices. __ Good swimmer. __ Can think on feet.
Actual, Authentic Celebrity Endorsement
“Steve Quint: the only patter performer who’s not a nattering nincompoop!” – Jonathan Harris, Dr. Smith of TV’s Lost in Space.
From reviews of NYGASP performances...
>Peter G. Davis, New York Magazine:
"Stephen Quint as Sir Joseph Porter is the ideal G&S patter-song comedian: elfin, waspish, agile, and blessed with a pleasantly lean-textured voice that articulates notes and words with absolute clarity."
>Joseph McLellan, The Washington Post:
"It was all right when Stephen Quint gave a translation ("rode a horse") for the outrageous "sat agee" in his "Modern Major-General"'s song and tossed in an oblique allusion to "Who Wants to be a Millionaire," but he was on thin ice when his mustache slipped into his mouth, mushing his diction for a moment, and he ripped it off. One couldn't help wondering: Was it an accident on Friday night or does he do it every time? If he does, he is a wild-eyed radical, albeit an extremely funny one."
Of course I don't do it every time. It was hotter than heck, and my sweat, which I admit may have had a little alcohol in it, dissolved the spirit gum (adhesive).
>Some moron in an online review:
"I'm afraid that I found Stephen Quint's Ko-Ko simply irritating. A more than capable acrobat, Mr Quint displayed none of the vocal finesse, whether singing or speaking, that alone can keep Ko-Ko off his own little list. As one says of a fine Italian singer, that he has 'the garlic,' so Mr Quint lacks 'the Grossmith.' (Watch Topsy Turvey and you'll see what I mean.)"
Yeah, watch Topsy "TURVEY" (sic) and you'll see what he means -- that Ko-Ko should be played as fey and phony as possible by a real obnoxious weirdo! The guy who played Grossmith in the movie did it that way because we learn at the end that he was supposed to be a junkie! (there's no evidence that he was, though).
Kitties, Alan Hill, pizza, quiet, Dickens, loose pants, Bela Lugosi, weird old Max Fleischer cartoons, obese people at Wal-Mart, Oliver Hardy (greatest film actor ever), cannibals.